Friday, September 9, 2011

Because I Need to Vent

Originally posted by Selena@BecauseMotherhoodSucks.com

July 27, 2011
Being poor sucks. Seriously. Being poor but not poor enough to qualify for State health insurance is even worse. Because it forces you to have to do stupid things for medical care.

I have been going to a community health center.
When I first went there I was happy I found it because I was really sick and I wouldn't have to mortgage my kid to get some antibiotics. Granted, it is in a terrifying part of town and filled with people who smell bad and look worse, but it was cheap and these were actual real doctors who were willing to see me without an up front cash payment.

But as time has gone on, the gratefulness has worn off. I am pretty sure they have no idea what they are doing and I am not getting anything close to decent health care.

I have Major Depression. I have been struggling with it on and off for most of my life and in the last 6 months I have been especially dragged down and lethargic. I am medicated but it isn't working and the waiting list for the Psychiatrist at the health center is (literally) 10 months.

I have been getting my prescription needs met by a very nice but extremely young (he may not be legal) Physicians Assistant that we will call Aaron.

My doctor.
Aaron is terrified of me because he knows absolutely NOTHING about psychiatric medications and I have a long and tumultuous history with them. When I first went to him, I was having withdrawals because I had run out of my meds while waiting for my mail-order supply to come from Canada (yes, it's legal). And he was happy to write me the script.

The next time he saw me, I told him that the drugs that I was on weren't working and he upped the dosage. The next time he added something else to the mix. He has tested me for Thyroid problems and Anemia and finally today I told him that he has to prescribe me something else because this shit is NOT working for me and I can't be lethargic and miserable all day every day because I am going to lose my family and my job like this.

So, he nervously agrees to put me BACK on a high dosage of Prozac until I can get into the Psychiatry department where I only have about 4 months left to wait.

But here's the thing. He wants me OFF the shit I am on entirely before I start the minimal dosage of the Prozac. I told him this is a huge mistake. I told him that I will not survive the transition if my previous experience of going off the meds is any indication of the potential for problems. He told me that he has to be cautious and that there is no other way. I told him that as someone who has been through the transition, I know that this is dangerous and I will likely end up at the very least traumatizing my kid and losing my job and in the most likely situation will end up hospitalized. He told me to come back in 6 weeks and to call him if I have any problems, which is easier said than done because when you call there you essentially just get transferred around until you end up on a line that rings forever.

When I went to make my 6 week follow up appointment, the girl gives me a date exactly 2 months from today. I say to her, "that's more than 6 weeks," to which she replies, "well it's two months...and there's 3 weeks in a month.".

"No, there's 4 weeks in a month, and July and August are long months," I reply.

She gives me this look like she is going to slap me and says, "there's 3 weeks in a month...give or take."

What the hell am I supposed to say to that? So I shut up and take my appointment card knowing that I am getting bad advice from my doctor and that the staff is stupid and incompetent.

I don't feel good about this at all. What the fuck am I supposed to do?

Then there's this:

No comments:

Post a Comment